When you first start dating someone, do you find yourself constantly in your head, thinking incessantly about where the relationship is going and whether it’s going to work out?
For both women and men with anxious attachment, it can be hard to be present with what’s happening in the moment, and truly enjoy the bliss of falling in love.
Here are 5 Major Signs You Have Anxious Attachment:
1. Instead of having fun on your date, you wind up analyzing every random comment for some hint of meaning about your future together.
2. Instead of sweetly missing them, you feel contracted or even a bit panicked after too much time apart.
3. Instead of taking things slowly, you rush into the next phase of your relationship so you can feel safe and connected. (This includes texting and expecting responses non-stop, sleeping together too soon, spending all your time together, etc).
4. Instead of voicing your own preferences, you act deferential to theirs (people-pleasing) and then later resent them for it.
5. Instead of being pleased when things are calm, cool, and collected between the two of you (which might feel boring to you), you act out and create drama.
If any of this sounds familiar, I want you to know that it’s not YOU as a person. You are not broken. You just have a pattern that’s been ingrained in your subconscious, and after years and years of reinforcement, that pattern has your subconscious running the show.
This is why it’s so hard for you to relax when you’re with someone you like.
And without some deep healing and rewiring, no amount of willpower or mindset work is going to change it.
But you CAN have a better experience.
You can HEAL this.
You can rewire your attachment style.
You can have a healthy, happy, secure relationship with someone who loves you.
If you’re ready to finally go beyond the anxiety and experience real love, I’d love to help you!
I want you to go to one of the links below and join one of our Masterclasses where we'll help you get crystal clear on exactly what's been keeping you in a pattern of feeling anxious and dating avoidant or unavailable people.
Then, if you want more, we can map out a plan for how you can shift this pattern — forever — and get into the best relationship of your life! Just hit one of those buttons below to get started, and I'll see you on the other side!
Love,
Maya

MA, Dating & Relationship Coach