Many women believe they can recognize an Unavailable man. Maybe he’s married, has a girlfriend, or says he won’t commit. It’s obvious, right?
But what about all the subtle cues so many women miss, that show when a man is NOT ready for a mature relationship, and therefore unavailable?
Here is a list of some red and yellow flags to keep in mind:
1) He had a very challenging or abusive relationship with a parent, sibling or other close family member, and has not done significant therapy or comparable healing work
2) He had one or more highly traumatic events happen in his life and hasn’t done significant therapy or healing work
3) He hasn’t had a long term, committed relationship before, that lasted more than 2 years.
4) His breakups with exes were sudden and didn’t end well
5) He still blames his exes for the relationship issues, and hasn’t taken responsibility for his part in what went wrong.
6) He broke up with his exes because he says they wanted too much time, attention or commitment OR for a very minor reason (“She took too long to get ready to go out!”)
7) He moved in with or married a his exes within a few months, and things ended quickly
8) He makes big promises about commitment and marriage very early on, before the “love high” has worn off.
9) He is an addict or alcoholic and has not completed a 12-step program or extensive therapy, and been sober for several years.
10) He has very negative self talk (which will evolve into how he speaks to you).
11) He is not clear on his purpose or happy with his career.
12) His words and actions don’t line up. He tells you he is all in but you acts or feels like he has one foot out the door.
13) He doesn’t take you on many dates or initiate them.
14) When you invite him to things he is wishy washy about saying yes.
15) He can’t or won’t sustain eye contact for very long.
16) He complains about his close friends and blames them for their conflicts.
17) He doesn’t share a vision for your future together.
18) He’s overly fearful about getting you pregnant.
19) He is fixated on a particular body type or feature, and he can’t feel attracted to anyone who doesn’t have it.
20) His life is a scattered, disorganized mess and isn’t currently improving.
21) You catch him telling small lies early on (or big lies later on!)
22) He’s hiding things from you.
This isn’t a comprehensive list. In fact, there are thousands of possible indications that a man isn’t available for a healthy, committed relationship.
This is why you need to:
a) Know as many of the red and yellow flags as you can.
b) Completely rewire the subconscious part of your brain and your nervous system that keeps choosing to be with a non-committal, wounded, disempowered man.
c) Learn how to date in a healthy way that easily attracts the amazing man you’re meant to be with and repels Mr. Unavailable.
Any solution that offers only one of these three elements is a partial fix that won’t solve the core problem.
And, partially fixing this problem is dangerous:
– If you just learn some of the flags you could fail to notice other, crucial signs of unavailability, and get hurt by Mr. Wrong.
– If you do inner healing work but don’t know how to date strategically, you could easily get frustrated and discouraged before you find him… in a sea of Unavailable men who can’t wait to meet you.;)
– If you learn how to date without knowing the flags and rewiring your patterns, you’ll just pick another unavailable man by mistake.
So… have you been dating these men?
Has it been hard to let them go?
Have these “partial fixes” failed you? (We have so many clients who practically tried every program and coach out there before finding us!)
If so, we can help you solve this problem once and for all, and get into the best relationship of your life, just like we’ve done for hundreds of women in your situation.
As a first step, I invite you to apply for a complimentary love breakthrough session with my team so you can get clear on why you’ve chosen these men, why you stayed with them, and the steps you need to take to rewire your brain and nervous system, date strategically, and spot an unavailable man… so you can finally find your match.
Go here to apply for your session: empowerlove.us/apply
One phone call is all it takes to get started on the path of healing and creating an amazing love life.